I was sitting here trying to read blogs, and I have a million things going through my head. So, I thought I would get them down. This will probably be incoherent to anyone but me, but read on anyway if you wish.
1. Bennett Speck is doing so good! He got his chest tubes out today, so they are one step closer to holding him. You can go to his site for the latest. www.totsites.com/tot/bennettmitchell. Please keep them in your prayers.
2. Campbell is done nursing and it has made me sadder than I thought it would. But I just wasn't being a good mom to the rest of the kids because I was so tired. So, this is the decision I have made. I am feeling guilty and depressed, but I know a lot of that is the hormones talking. I am proud of myself for sticking it out for almost four months.
3. My stress level is having a very negative effect on my oldest, Jordan. His behavior is really trying my patience. The thing is, he is perfect at school. His teacher wrote on his homework the other day, "You are my shining star!" But when he gets home, I feel like all I do is discipline him. It is very tiring. He has so many great gifts, but I am having trouble focusing on those at the moment.
4. I love my family so much it hurts. When I look at my kids and my husband and realize how unbelievably blessed I am, I just ache. My heart couldn't be more full.
5. I miss God. I feel Him right now, but I miss the Bible study time I am used to. I want to lead another one, but I don't know where I would find the time. I don't have a very good prayer life. But, I have found that I can pray a lot during the day without even knowing it. And I have been doing that a lot lately, which is why I have been feeling God walking me through each day.
I have a lot more that I could share, but I need to go and hold Luke before he goes to sleep. He is watching Dora and Campbell is asleep on Stephen, who is also asleep. If my camera batteries weren't dead, I'd take a picture. It is pretty sweet. It reminds me of that quote, "Life isn't measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."